I'm tired

I'm tired.
I'm tired of PROBLEMS.
I'm tired of hearing problems.
I'm tired of hearing my own problems.

I'm tired.
I'm tired of LOVE.
I'm tired of listening to other's love story.
I'm tired of listening to my imaginary love story.
A story that has nothing to begin with.

I'm tired.
I'm tired of FRIENDS.
I'm tired of my friends.
I'm tired of seeing them, talking to them, listening to them.
I'm tired of knowing that they are happy, that they are sad.

I'm tired of being a friend.
Sometimes it is really good to be an enemy.
Or better yet, just nothing at all.
A leper with nobody, I guess.


I'm tired.
I'm tired of my JOB.
I'm tired of wasting almost 12 hours every day of my life doing the so-called "job".
I'm tired of working and earning but saved nothing.

I'm tired.
I'm tired of my FAMILY.
I just really, really wanna be free, be independent.
But how about my mom, I can't just leave her.

I'm tired.
I'm tired of my LIFE.
My dream of travelling the world might just be "just a dream" afterall.
My dream of knowing myself might just be one of the unsolved misteries of life.

I'm just tired.
I'm tired of being tired.
And even hearing the word rest is so tiring for me.
For rest is not enough to replenish the energy, time and love I needed to move on.

I'm tired.
I'm really, really, really tired.
I'm sorry.
I'm really, really, really sorry for getting so tired.

I know I'm still young to get so tired.
And I don't know how long I'm gonna be tired.
My eyes are closing, my mind is shutting down.
I'm just tired, so please bear with me, please?

Ang Simpleng Pangarap

Simpleng tao kagaya ko

Simpleng pangarap lang ang nais ko

Madalas akong mangarap

At kalimitan dito ay tila mahirap malasap

Nais ko lamang ang mga bagay na tulad ng sa iba

Pero para sa iba, nais pa nila’y mas higit pa sa kanila

Nais kong mahiga sa tabi ng karagatan

Abutin ang mga tuktok ng mga kabundukan

Nais kong makipagkwentuhan ng walang katapusan

At masalita ng mga bagay na walang katuturan

Nais kong mamasyal kasama ng mga kaibigan

Kaibigang ang nais din ay matinding lakwatsahan

Pumunta sa mga lugar na hindi pa namin napupuntahan

Manatili duon hanggang sa aming pagsawaan

Nais kong magwaldas ng maraming salapi

Bilhin ang mga bagay na nais ko na tila isang api

Nais kong makakilala ng maraming tao

Mga taong tunay at hindi lamang pakitang tao

Nais kong maging matagumpay at mayaman

Pero ayokong may naiiwanan at nakakalimutan

Nais kong maging kaka-iba

At hindi lang basta-basta

Ngunit sa hirap ng buhay ngayon

Ang nais ko’y unti-unting makaahon

At dahil dito ako’y titigil muna

Dahil ang aking trabaho ay naghihintay na….hehehe

What I really hate....

I really hate an animal or people staring me as if they were gonna eat me.
And I really hate people who can’t stare at me when they’re talking to me.

I really hate people who are telling lies and I hate myself for being a liar.

I really hate somebody who can’t stand on their own and I really hate those who are so liberated.

I really hate to love because I know that as the goes by they would hate me.

I really hate to commit into something because I know that someday I will start to hate them.

I really hate to believe in someone is saying not until they really did it.

I really hate seeing some people who would destroy my future because they are not worthy to spend any of my time.

I really hate to work, to work to somebody who doesn’t even know the real meaning of professionalism.

I really hate to be happy because I know that after that happiness there’s a great sadness that is waiting.

I really hate to be alone but I really needed someone to cry on right now.

I really hate this feeling of anger because I know that this wouldn’t bring any good to me now.

I really hate people who are blaming somebody for they don’t really know what is really happening.

I really hate being acknowledged because for sure they really don’t mean that.

I really hate being hated because I didn’t really know what’s wrong with me.

I really hate to put in a situation in where I already admitted that I was wrong and yet they keep on pounding me. (TAO LANG PO!)

And now I’m starting to hate myself because I know that in the first place this is really not the place where I should be.

I hate my life because it always gives me this confusion that I was just living to hate everything and to be hated by everything.

I just wish that I already made the right decision from that first place
I just wish I have someone to talk to because this hatred might kill me.

Decoy

We’ve been together for quite some time

I am all yours and you are all mine

The days and nights are our witnesses

To this love that’s full of hugs and kisses

Then, one day, you told me something

You wanted to leave me all of a sudden

Separating from all of our devotions

And going to your newly found connection

I thought you have something for me

But instead, all you wanted to be

Is to miff this emotion according to your ploy

And left me in the middle of this decoy

I’m sorry if I’ve been too trusting

Believing that you’re always up for something

Something that will make this heart

Happy, contented and will never fall apart

Yellow Flowers

I love yellow flowers

You gave ‘em to me for starters

I love dark chocolates

We shared ‘em as we became good mates

Your blinding aura sheds me a wonderful light

Your killer smile stabs my loneliness to death

Your fierce gaze melts down the ugliness in me

Your scorching touch warms my freezing heart

Those days I never thought you’ll be there

Were the days I’ll always treasure

The comfort and the feeling I can’t explain

Just remembering it drives me insane

We’ve loved each other very much

I know deep inside we still do

But for now, can we be friends?

Because I want you to be HAPPY.

…don’t worry about me,

I still have yellow flowers.

Just Simply Alone

Another night of solitude;
A silent night without my dude.
Tears rolling down my cheeks;
A silent voice from my soul speaks.

I’m wishing for someone;
Someone who’s willing to understand.
The pain that suddenly struck;
Targeting my heart of its attack.

I know what I’m feeling is so shallow;
But these feelings always seems to follow;
My virgin defenseless heart;
Which is starting to fall apart.

I’ve been looking forward for this ending;
I just never thought it will be this hurting.

I entrusted myself with so much thought that you’re gone;
But then when I knew that you’re already with someone;
I just can’t help to think why I wasn’t the One;
For in my heart and mind you’ve been always that One.

I loved you;
The thought that I’m with you;
Just simply makes this roller coaster ride;
Like we are newly groom and bride.

The idea of a bump and ride;
were gone as my tears dried.
Why did you ignore this heart that’s seeking you’re attention?
Why did you ignore this heart which true love is its only mission?

I guess the answer should come from me;
Because the only person in this relationship is no other than me.

Pusong Malikot.

Tumitibok-tibok, kumikirot-kirot

Pusong malikot maglaro’y napakaharot

Kapag ito’y nasimulang kumurot

Maaaring masaya, pwede ring nakakatakot

Ligaya ang dulot kung ito’y gumaan

Kasawain naman kapag ito’y nabigatan

Walang labang inuurungan pag ito’y hinamon

Handa daw lumaban kahit anong panahon

Subalit ng si Kupido na ang maglaro

Itong pusong malikot tila nalito

Pag-ibig nga ba ito?

O, bakit ganito?

Ang inaakalang laro

Nauwi sa madugong pakikipagbuno

Ngayon, itong pusong nagpakalikot

Unti-unti, dahan-dahang namamaluktot

Kapag daka’y pag-ibig na tila utot

Inubos ang mabangong hangin at naging mabantot

Pusong malikot tumigil na sa pagiging maharot

Manhid, tulala at ni hindi na makibot

Kung dati’y lahat ng bagay ay kinakalikot

Ngayon, sa kasamaang palad, balot na ito ng poot.

Masakit Pala.

Sa lakas ng tunog

Ng dibdib na dumadagundong

Pilit na ikinukubli

Sugat na kay hapdi

Ilang araw umasa

Ilang buwan nagpakasasa

Sa bandang huli din pala

Puso ko’y basta lang nabalewala

Akala ko’y hindi magiging ganito

Akala ko’y walang sakit na maibabato

Ngunit ang damdaming umasa

Sa luha ay basang basa

Masakit nga talaga

Kapag ang puso na ang nataga

Sabi ng isang kaibigan, mag-ingat ako

Ngunit ako ay nagpakahulog, nagpaloko

 

Kasabay ng luhang gumugulong

Ang aking puso ay nakulong

Sa isang kakaibang panginip

Ng sadyang napakabilis kong idlip

 

Sa bandang huli

Puso at isipa’y sabay nagsisisi

Ang pusong nabigo at walang napala

Sa isipa’y nagsasabi, masakit pala.